Sympathy, Empathy, and Compassion

“What the world needs more than sympathy and empathy is compassion.”  ~ Adam Grant

There has been an abundance of leadership literature in the field of emotional intelligence and the role of empathy. A blog at sdtestme suggests that “Empathy, defined as the ability to understand and share the feelings of others, has gained recognition as a vital component of effective leadership. Research suggests that leaders who demonstrate empathy are more likely to establish positive relationships with their team members, promote trust, and enhance employee well-being (Eisenbeiss et al., 2018; Gentry et al., 2007).”

Other research (Jacqueline Carter et al) has concluded that empathy and compassion are two distinct mental states. Carter states that with empathy we feel with the person and take on their emotions. This is contrasted with compassion as an intention to benefit others as we ask ourselves how we can support someone going through difficulty. CEO’s such as Paul Polman of Unilever suggest that empathy can get in the way of necessary action and the balancing of the needs of multiple stakeholders. Empathy may distort our judgment in order to benefit those we empathize rather than with the needs of multiple people in our organization. Carter et al have conducted extensive research on this topic and used it as a basis for their book Compassionate Leadership: How to Do Hard Things in a Human Way.

I think some of the literature on this subject is made more murky by how you define the words sympathy, empathy and compassion. As you might surmise the definitions are plentiful and have distinct differences. Adam Grant suggested in a November 11, 2021 social media post that Sympathy is ‘I’m sorry you are in pain.’ Empathy is ‘I feel your pain.’ and Compassion is ‘I’ll do whatever I can to alleviate your pain.’ He goes further to state that “What the world needs more than sympathy and empathy is compassion. You don’t have to feel other people’s feelings. You just have to care about their feelings.”

Take some time to reflect on your thoughts of sympathy, empathy and compassion. What are the ways that you can be a compassionate leader while securing your well-being and the well-being of your people and the organization you lead?